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Friday, October 21, 2005

Prepatent Paradise (redluctant cocoanuts unite)

If one could bottle lightning one could rule the world. At least that's what my Great Uncle Excellsior used to say. Being as ole Sel (as we called him) was never a man to be proven wrong, it would stand to reason that on one brisk October dusk, One Beatrice the Bicycle was blessed with a jolt of Vulcan's mannah.

Now, for those of you who don't know, Beatrice the Bicycle is one of planet Earth's only remaining self propelled bicycles. Manufactured officially "Back in the Day", these uberefficient machines rolled over the surface of our Wonderful World in Peace, until Man came along and tamed them. And, for those of you who still don't understand, our friend Beatrice the Bicycle was stricken by lightning on a chilly day in the tenth month of the year 2005.

I'd never seen her so happy. Always bursting to take you anywhere! One afternoon we whirled off to Kingdom Come and marveled at the wonders of the lost city Hiroshima. There it stood as though no one or nothing had ever touched it.

Charged by Mother Nature, Beatrice the Bicycle blazed through her streets and gave life to her ghosts. The world over, crops grew and babies laughed.

I love you.


Thursday, October 20, 2005

His Terpsichorean Activities

I know you've all heard the rumor that I was attacked by one of those big trucks that picks up dumpsters and empties them into its retrograde belly. There is some truth to that, but the real scoop is that I caught a bad case of the boogie fever. Ladies and Gentlemen, since my last post I have clogged, tapped, broke, shook, waltzed, swung and contrad my way through every single piece of music ever recorded. That's right, it was a 24/7 daaaaance party, I wish you could have come.

At any rate, once I'd rocked my way through history's entire catalog, my feet still longed to move, sooooooooooooo I decided to create a new dance number every day. My goal is to do this for 100 days, and I'm somewhere around day 80. If you would like to peruse these songs please go to:

Song-A-Day Podcast

That address once again is:

Song-A-Day Podcast

See ya there!